Sharon Rosenblum Tarlow

Asch: Sharon, thank you for agreeing to do this today. The first question I want to ask you is when and where you were born.
TARLOW: I was born in Spokane Washington, September 18, 1933 in Sacred Heart Hospital.

Asch: Were you the oldest child?
TARLOW: I was the only child and I lived in Spokane until I was a year and a half and then my parents moved to Longview, Washington. So essentially I grew up in Longview.

Asch: What did your father do for a living?
TARLOW: My father, in Spokane, worked for an insurance company. Of course it was right during the Depression and things weren’t so good. He had an opportunity to join an aunt and uncle of my mom’s in the retail grocery business so that’s what he did and he was in that business for a long time.

Asch: What was his and your mother’s full names?
TARLOW: My mother was Molly Kors Rosenblum. My dad was Herman Rosenblum.

Asch: And did you have lots of cousins and aunts and uncles around?
TARLOW: No, I didn’t actually. Being an only child, my mother encouraged me to have lots of friends which I did and so that was kind of my family, my friends. And then after my parents lived in Longview for a while both sets of my grandparents also moved to Longview. So I had four adoring grandparents and being an only child that was not painful. [laughs] And then later on my dad’s brother moved to Longview and he and his wife had three children but they were much younger. Anyway it was a good life living in Longview.
 
Asch: What was your uncle and aunt and their kids’ names?
TARLOW: My uncle was Alan Rosenblum and his wife was Eloise; they’re both gone. And their children were Kay and David; they were both adopted. And they later on had another child, Linda, which was a birth child.

Asch: Are you still in contact with them?
TARLOW: No, unfortunately. There was a rift after my uncle died. We tried to keep in touch but it’s not been working unfortunately.

Asch: And you mentioned the grandparents all moved. What were their names and where were they moving from?
TARLOW: They were all moving from Spokane. And I never knew why they went to Spokane. I’ve never been able to figure out what brought them there. I have a feeling it was because of an opportunity, being immigrants they needed opportunities. My grandparents were Clara and Sam Rosenblum and for a while they lived in Spokane. When I was a kid I used to visit them. I used to go on the train with my mom or my dad and we’d sleep on the train; that’s how long it took. My other grandparents were Jenny and Abe Crystal and that was my grandmother’s second husband because her first husband had died when my mom and uncle were really young.

Asch: Did your parents know each other growing up if they both were from Spokane?
TARLOW: Well, no. They met at a B’nai B’rith picnic. They were both born in New York and then eventually came to Spokane. They were children; they casually knew each other. Spokane seemed to be kind of a drawing card for a lot of Jewish families. I can’t tell you why because it seemed like in the middle of nowhere at the time. And some of those families still live there. 

Asch: Do you know what synagogue they belonged to?
TARLOW: There was a synagogue and I think now there may be. I don’t have the name of that synagogue. I might have it somewhere but I don’t have it on the tip of my tongue. Yes, they belonged to the synagogue. The Rosenbloom grandparents are buried in the cemetery there, as is one of my grandfathers. The Crystal grandparents are buried here at Beth Israel, as are my parents. 

Asch: You said you didn’t know why they moved to Spokane but what did they do for a living?
TARLOW: My grandfather had a store. It was just eclectic kind of stuff. I can’t ever remember visiting the store but I remember living with them in Spokane for maybe a month at a time in the summer. I had a room to myself upstairs in a house that I thought was just huge until I saw it as an adult and realized that it wasn’t. The Marcus family lived there then so Bud Marcus and I spent a lot of time–he terrorizing me although he said he didn’t. But my grandfather would get up early to go to work and he would leave a nickel and a penny on the dresser so that I could walk a block to the store and with a nickel buy an ice cream bar and with the penny buy bubble gum. I remember spending a lot of time with him and my grandmother also. It was such a different time you have to realize. It was in the ‘30s, and people were out of work. I remember people coming to the back door of my grandparents’ house and my grandmother would give them food. And she had a wood stove and a pantry, a screened in pantry so that things kept cold even though she had a refrigerator. We did a lot of walking; we did a lot of playing with the kids that lived there. It was a wonderful time. I loved going there. And I was almost disappointed when they moved to Longview.

Asch: You lost your vacation house.
TARLOW: I did.

Asch: You mentioned Bud Marcus. He was living in the house?
TARLOW: Not in my grandparents’ house. But they lived nearby, his parents and him. And he and my dad had such a strong association, even till the day my dad died here in Portland. He and Bud were very, very close. And then they moved to Portland because his mother didn’t like living in Spokane. She kept kosher; she couldn’t keep kosher easily in Spokane and she missed her Portland family which was part of Rosalie’s  [Goodman] family. So when they lived in Portland and we lived in Longview we would visit often. We would drive the car when we had enough gas points to do that during the war, of course, and they would do the same.

Asch: You mentioned that there was a very strong connection between the Marcus family and your family.
TARLOW: Right.

Asch: Can you talk a little bit about that?
TARLOW: Well because Bud’s dad was orphaned, essentially, as a young child and my grandmother raised him with my uncle and my dad and they always maintained a very strong relationship. So when we would come and visit them in Spokane or in Portland and they would come to Longview it was a very joyous time. And we’re still close. In fact, they’re kind of my only relatives.

Asch: Were they already cousins? How did Bud’s father end up in your grandparents’ house?
TARLOW: His parents had died and the daughter of that family went to live with another family. There were three children. The older of those three children died as a young person. And so here was Bud’s dad, Harry Marcus, and he needed a home. So my grandparents had a home for him. And it brought all of us closer together of course. He had nice memories, except when he terrorized me. [laughs]

Asch: I actually have a stack of photos in front of me, the first one I wanted to talk about is Sharon at maybe 18 months old holding a rattle. Is this in Spokane or in Longview?
TARLOW: This is probably in Spokane because it says 1934 and we moved, I think, in 1935. So yes, this was in Spokane. It’s really interesting because my mom talks about tough times and how she had to budget everything because they didn’t have any money from the Depression. And I have probably six of these pictures, different poses so they must have been very cheap; the photographer must have needed the money. And the other thing that my mom did, someday I may give it to the museum—my very first doll was a rag doll, a black child. A black rag doll, and I still have her, Topsy. And I know that my mom bought it because it was probably the cheapest doll in the store. My dad didn’t talk about it so much but my mother and my grandmother did; it [the Depression] was tough. And they were careful about spending money on their food and not wasting things. And then for me to have six different poses of this picture blows my mind. 

Asch: We’ve heard a lot about Spokane. What was Longview like? Was there a large Jewish population? 
TARLOW: Not at all, there were maybe five Jewish families. There were families there that were associated with the Longview Fiber Company. Longview was a planned city. It was patterned after Washington DC. There’s a circle in the middle of the city and streets. Two of the founders came from the mid-west: the Wallenburg family, which was very prominent in Reed College although they lived in Longview, and the Wertheimer family, both lived in Longview. But they were sort of off to themselves. The families that we associated with were the Goldberg family and the Marcheck family. There were probably about five Jewish families. In my high school there were three Jewish kids, Wilma Goldberg Kaplan, who lives here now and Alan Goldberg and we were buddies. Most of my friends were Christian. I went to Kessler School for Kindergarten through 8th grade. Oh my God, that was a trip. And the principal lived across the street. Then I went to Robert E. Long High School and he, too, was the principal of that school. His daughter was one of my best friends so I had to be a good girl.

Asch: You weren’t going to get away with much.
TARLOW: No, and going to school I remember that I walked to school early on when my parents would let me. And then I would ride my bike. And I came home for lunch, which is unheard of now; that would never happen. Then later on I took my lunch. And in high school there was a cafeteria. So I ate whatever I wanted or not.

Asch: What do you remember about your house or your street?
TARLOW: My house was really interesting. When we first moved there in 1935 we lived in a duplex on 21st avenue. And the family on the other side was the Goldberg family, Sy and Edith Goldberg and their son Alan. They’ve all passed away. They remained very close friends all through my childhood and even into adulthood. Alan and I, I remember, used to play in the backyard making mud pies. That was such a big deal because it rained a lot and it was not luxurious. We lived a block from the park and we’d go to the park with our parents and run and play. 

And then we upgraded when my mother’s parents were going to move to Longview. They rented a house so that the two families could live in it. It was on 22nd avenue and it’s still there. It was great having grandparents like I had. You know Peter, I have to just say I had the best family. And when I think about what I hear on the radio and the pedophiles and the beatings of children and how neglected some of them are I think “Oh my God.” I never experienced that, nor did I know anyone that did. If they did we didn’t know it of course. Longview was a great place to grow up. I think the population was 19,000 when I left to go to college. So then we lived together. And I was not always the sweetest most—what shall I say? I didn’t always conform to the rules. And my grandmother never let me get away with anything. 

But then in 19…. (I was in the first grade so I must have been six years old) my parents built a house at 1152 23rd avenue; it’s still there. It was a big deal for them to have a house and I had a room all to myself. And we had a backyard. And we had wonderful neighbors. The house is still there but it’s different. About two or three years ago my daughter and I went to Longview to visit a friend who has been a friend forever and she arranged for us to visit with the family that lives in the house that I grew up in. I just loved it, it was different. They had changed a lot of things and added to it. But my room was still there. And I checked it out very carefully. That was really a treat. 

The neighborhood was just middle class; people had yards. There were sidewalks and there were trees, maple trees. We used to play outside in the street. We rode our bikes all over the place; that would just never happen today. The town is small and then pretty soon it’s farmland. And I had friends that lived on the farmland. It was not unusual for me to ride my bike by myself, maybe half a mile, maybe three quarters of a mile, and be on a farm with my friend. The other thing that was really special to me was my friends that were not Jewish and how much we did together and at Christmas—that’s a whole other story with me and Christmas; it was traumatic for me at a point to not have a Christmas tree. Our next door neighbors had Christmas and they always included us with the Santa Claus and the whole magilla but…. One of my friends always invited me to come and trim the tree and I would take an ornament. And every year we talk to each other, can you imagine? We’re both 80 years now and we talk to each other and she tells me how she still uses the ornaments that I brought her when we were kids. And so those kinds of things were very special to me. There were other times when I was left out of things because I was Jewish. And it was not very blatant but when I look back on it now there was a pattern. My mother had lots of Christian friends and my mother was very active in the community, very. And so was my dad, he did a lot of things, both of them did and they were my models. But it was heartbreaking sometimes to be left out of things that some of my other friends, and good friends were being part of.

Asch: Was that antisemitism or was it just being non-Christian you weren’t part of that community?
TARLOW: I think both, I think some of the parents were a little uppity and it was fine that we had birthday parties together and all that kind of stuff but it was latent. It was never an in-your-face kind of thing. But it was there and it’s too bad. And even when I went to college I went to the University of Washington and there were four or five of us that went there. Each of us ended up in a different sorority and of course I had to be in a Jewish sorority, the others dropped me. So we just spent some time together on Saturdays in Seattle. But it was there.

Asch: Getting back to the pictures, we have a picture of you and your brother–
TARLOW: No, that’s not my brother that’s Alan Goldberg. He and I lived in the duplex together.

Asch: Yes, that’s what I wanted to say. I’m sorry.
TARLOW: And he always said he wanted to marry me, even though he was a couple of years younger. We remained friends until he died at a young age a few years ago.

Asch: Is that the front yard of the duplex?
TARLOW: You know, I’m looking at the house across the street and I can’t remember. but it was in Longview definitely. Oh look how my mother dressed me, a coat with a hat and [inaudible. sounds like “adge” 21:38.5]  

Asch: There are a couple photos here of outfits your mother picked out for you that are very fashionable for the time.
TARLOW: Yes, I wonder if it’s the same coat. Do you think so? It looks like it.

Asch: It looks like the same coat and you look about the same age. Do you recognize this house?
TARLOW: Yes, that’s my house in Longview, Washington.

Asch: The one your parents built?
TARLOW: Yes.

Asch: I do want to get to your experiences in Portland but is this–
TARLOW: This is a birthday party and it was such a big deal and you can see in the photo that the birthday girl has a corsage, a gardenia corsage. Her name was Diane Girling and it was one of those, “I don’t know how I got invited” kind of things but I did. And here I am right here.

Asch: Do you know where this is?
TARLOW: This, I believe, is in the hotel. It was such a big deal, Peter, to go to a kid party and sit around a beautifully decorated table. Look, with candles and flowers and that looks like an Easter Bunny also, amazing. These are kids I went to school with.

Asch: Are you still in contact with any of them?
TARLOW: Unfortunately, no. So many of them, also, have died. But it’s a great picture.

Asch: And then an equally great photo is a picture of a teenage you on a big parade float.
TARLOW: I know, is that amazing? In the ‘40s, this is a float on Lake Sacagawea that runs through Longview. My mother belonged to the Women’s Club, it was a club of women who did good things in the community. They were sponsoring a float; I can’t even remember, well it had to be in the summer. And this was the Women’s’ Club float. And I think this doll represents the fact that they may have been nice to children and supported children’s interests.

Asch: How were you chosen? 
TARLOW: By default, I guess [laughs] I don’t know. If you knew me then, I looked nothing like this most every day. I was not a frou-frou kind of person. And to be all gussied up in that strapless dress with sparkly sleeves is totally amazing.

Asch: It wasn’t like the Longview Rose Parade or…. Do you remember the reason?
TARLOW: Well they did it every year and they used the lake which extended I would say at least a mile or a mile and a half through the town so the banks of the lake were where all the people were. So I think it was an annual thing and maybe because I was not so glamourous I wasn’t asked to do it again. [laughs] But anyway it was fun; it was so out of character for me and I loved every minute of it with the make-up and the hair and the whole business. It was fun.

Asch: So there were only five Jewish families?
TARLOW: I would say about five Jewish families. The Goldbergs were in the furniture business. The Marshaks were in the men’s clothing business. And I should talk about the fact that I worked. I babysat, which I hated. I did not like babysitting. And I did work in a drugstore that was owned by the Miller Family, which came from Spokane originally. [She later remembers the girl in the family’s name was Sylvia Overback Miller]. Anyway she was Eve Rosenfeld’s sister. And I worked in their drugstore. People teased me because they said, “Did you fill our prescriptions?” Well, what I did was rearrange things and dust and just kind of worked downtown; it was fun. It was a block from my dad’s grocery store. Then I worked in the men’s clothing store another year. I was a little bit older and I wrapped packages. I earned money and I just thought I’d died and gone to heaven having a paycheck. And I could buy Hanukkah presents for everybody.

Asch: How old were you?
TARLOW: I think I was in junior high. And then I also worked in my dad’s grocery store. Now and then I would answer the phone and take orders because that time people could call up, order their food and it would be delivered to them. And that was kind of fun. My grandfather was also in the business and he didn’t like me working there; he was kind of tough on me. During the war the butchers in the grocery store went to war; they went to fight. And so my grandmother became a butcher. My mother did some work in the store and I did too. And we kept it going. Then at night after my dad would come home for dinner. It was in the ‘40s so I wasn’t very old. But he would go back down to the store to account for the red tokens and the blue tokens that people used. Because he had to account to the government for those kinds of things. So I would help count all that stuff. That business was lucrative. We had a nice middle class life. It wasn’t extravagant. My grandparents and my parents owned a Chevrolet between them because it was more economical to have one car and share it. The gas was an issue and they needed gas for the truck to deliver the food at the grocery store. Meat was hard to come by. The other thing that happened during the war in Longview, on an empty lot one day there appeared a bunch of soldiers. It was like an encampment of soldiers from the army. And my dad discovered who the Jewish soldiers were of course and we had them for dinner. We had soldiers for dinner at least twice a week. Because we had the meat in the store and people couldn’t buy it because they didn’t have enough rationing. So my mother would cook it and we would invite people for dinner, mostly soldiers. And that was kind of interesting too.

Asch: Who was working at the store?
TARLOW: It was my mother’s father. When they moved from Spokane to Longview he went into the business with my dad. But my dad really started the business. It was great. I would ride my bike from the house to the store if I wanted to. There was a movie house next door so on Saturdays I would go to the movie for a dime. And I would either come home with my dad after the movie and hang around the store driving him crazy. And next door to that on the other side of the store was a café where he ate lunch every day and where it was just fun to go to because everybody in the neighborhood who worked in that neighborhood had lunch. So it was like a little family. It was such a different time, peter, when I think about it. It was slow; it was unsophisticated. It was a time where your entertainment was in your house. My parents played bridge a lot. We didn’t have TV when I was a kid. We had radio. We had one telephone where you talked to the operator and told her what number you wanted. My home number was 178. Or if I wanted to call my dad at work. I would say to the operator the numbers, “1234.” And I had all my friends’ numbers memorized, of course. We spent a lot of time on the phone. It was nice growing up in that kind of an environment. Sometimes I didn’t like it because I knew that my cousin, Bud Marcus, was having much more fun here in Portland. You know, big time, right? More restaurants, that kind of thing. But it was a good thing, a very good thing.

Asch: Do you remember the address of your father’s store?
TARLOW: I want to say 1111 Commerce Avenue.

Asch: Have you visited anytime recently?
TARLOW: I have seen it. I haven’t been to Longview for a few years. Yes, it was something else; it was not a grocery store. It was like a community center for older adults. And the movie theater was closed and the restaurant was gone. The main street was Commerce Avenue. It looks pretty different now because now there are shopping centers; it’s big time.

Asch: How long did your father operate the store?
TARLOW: They operated it, I would say, probably from the time he moved there in ‘35 to maybe the ‘50s. I think after I was married because then he went into a business that my uncle had which was a pawn shop in Kelso. And Safeway was coming to Longview, on the same street as my dad’s store my great uncle and aunt’s grocery store and Piggly Wiggly. And Safeway was lifting its head; it impacted all of them. And my dad said, “This is not going to work for me.” And they went out of business and he went to work with my uncle and the West Coast Loan in Kelso because my uncle was not well. So the two of them ran that business for a while until my parents decided to retire and move to Portland because they wanted to be with their grandchildren, my children. 

Asch: Besides helping out in the store, did your mother ever have any other job?
TARLOW: No. she was a community—everything.

Asch: A community organizer. For vacation, I know you’ve provided us a photo of you and your parents down at Seaside. Was that a regular thing?
TARLOW: We often went to Seaside and we went often with the Goldberg family together. I tell my kids today, who go all over the world, it seems like, with the snap of a finger, “If I got to go to Seaside it was a big deal. Or going to Spokane, that was a vacation. We didn’t take big vacations like people do now, going to Hawaii; well that was absurd. We went to Seattle because my parents had friends there. We went to Seaside, and Long Beach, Washington, which is also a place that my dad liked to go to because he could clam dig. We often went to Long Beach. And I remember (I don’t know how old I was, probably kind of like in that age group), we would go and my grandfather and my dad would dig clams. And I would follow them of course. And whatever time of the day it was we cooked them and ate them. And I can still taste them. [laughs] They were so delicious. You can tell we did not keep kosher.

Asch: Did you, as many people did, keep kosher at home but not on vacation?
TARLOW: No, we didn’t keep kosher at all. My mother really wanted to be more Reform than she was growing up. And my dad went along with it. And it worked for Longview. We did belong to Temple [Beth Israel] in Portland from the time I was about 10 years old. I didn’t go to Sunday school there but we went for High Holidays and stayed in a hotel. And for Jewish holidays sometimes in Longview they would rent a rabbi, which a lot of small towns do. And for the 10 or 12 or 15 people that would attend my mother just had a fit because it was always so Orthodox. And none of us could understand a thing that was going on. So that spurred her on to have us join Temple. 

Asch: When you would go to Seaside would you see friends from Portland? 
TARLOW: We did. And that’s where I learned to ride a bike, on the prom at Seaside. We went in the ocean; we played in the sand (we had buckets); we went up and down the street; we ate Pronto Pups, which I can still savor as much as the clams. And again it was a family time, we played games after dinner; we went for a walk after dinner. My dad would take me out so we would have a bicycle ride lesson. And sometimes the Marcus family would be there or casual acquaintances more than anything.

Asch: I want to talk more about your Jewish experience, so were you the only family making that trek to Beth Israel?
TARLOW: Yes.

Asch: Did you feel a comradery with the kids of Beth Israel?
TARLOW: No, I really didn’t know them. In fact, my husband Larry was probably in the congregation when I was there. We laugh about it. I didn’t always like coming. What I liked was staying in the hotel. That was the most fun: eating in the dining room. But I’d sit there with the prayer book in my hand, the Union Prayer Book–my mother just loved it. She just loved being there. I would count the windows, the panes in the windows. I would count the decorations on the bima or the pipes of the organ. I was just bored to tears most of the time.

Asch: What hotel did you stay in?
TARLOW: The Heathman or the Benson. It was so much fun I just loved it. And then we’d see the Marcus family sometimes and we’d maybe shop a little bit. My dad often came to Portland to buy things for his grocery store. He used to go to the Dairygold Creamery, he used to go to the Jacob Hamburger Company. He used to—I don’t know—go to other places and sometimes I would come with him. One time he came here to do business and he came home with a puppy. [laughs] Which was also a big part of our lives, we always had a dog. Or he’d bring me a present or he’d bring me with him and we’d go shopping. My dad and I just had a wonderful time together. He was just a great guy.

Asch: When you went to Portland was that like going to the city?
TARLOW: Oh big time! And my mother used to dress up too when we’d go shopping. It was a big trip. It was two hours. Now it’s 45 minutes. She would wear high heals and gloves and a hat and she would go to Meier and Frank because on the mezzanine was where she took her silk stockings to be repaired; during the war there were no stockings. So yes, I remember coming to Portland. The Portland Hotel was where Pioneer Square is now. I remember coming here all the time but dressing up, dressing up. Who dresses up now? Go downtown in a sweat outfit, no body cares. [laughs] 

Asch: Before we get to you moving to Portland I just want to go back a little bit. You went to the University of Washington?
TARLOW: Yes, I did.

Asch: Was that your number one choice?
TARLOW: It was my only choice. It never occurred to me to go anywhere else because I was a resident of Washington. It was huge. Going from Longview, Washington to the university with all those Jewish kids just blew my mind. It was different and I was in a sorority, Phi Sigma Sigma. I think my stuff from there is here already. I didn’t like it. I didn’t like the sorority. I didn’t like the divisiveness; I didn’t like the blackballs of people at the meeting. Or I didn’t like the fact that many of the girls in my sorority didn’t want to associate with the young women who were of Sephardic heritage. I mean it was just so ridiculous. I just couldn’t believe it. I really couldn’t believe it. I was dating a very nice man, a young boy for a while and so I had a good time in that respect. But then my mother became ill and so I came home and I went to Lower Columbia College in Longview for a while. And then I met my husband and the college career went bye-bye.

Asch: So you didn’t graduate?
TARLOW: No.

Asch: When you went to Washington did you join a sorority because that was sort of the only way into the social atmosphere?
TARLOW: Exactly. It was safe, it was a safe environment for me. And I was glad in one way to have that experience. I laugh because my dad took me to school. We packed the car with all my stuff and my mother was standing on the porch clapping because I was finally moving out of the house and I wouldn’t be driving her nuts anymore. [laughs] It was good. My mother was glad for me, too. I would come home for vacations and they would come and visit. You know it was a very new experience for me.
 
Asch: Had they gone to college?
TARLOW: My dad went to college. My mother did not.

Asch: Was that important to her that you go?
TARLOW: I think that it was ‘education prevailed.’ I was expected to bring home decent grades and be a good student. And I was a good student. I was very active in high school. I belonged to the library club because it was one of the clubs that would take me and I eventually became president of it and I had a lot of friends. We had a good time.

Asch: When you went to the University of Washington was there a large contingent from your high school that also went there to have a little bit of a familiar face or was it too big?
TARLOW: Yes, there were about five of us and we were all in different sororities. And we would see each other sometimes on a Saturday but pretty soon that changed too because they became active in their sororities for one reason or another and so we would see each other when we were home in Longview more than we saw each other in Seattle. It was OK.

Asch: And then you came back and you went to Lower Columbia?
TARLOW: Yes, for just a short time. And one of my professors was Dr. Alfred Apsler who was a good friend of my parents, a refugee from Europe. And there are some things in the museum about him and his family. That was a nice experience. And then I met Larry and that was the end of it and that’s a whole other story.

Asch: Before we get to that story, what were you studying in college?
TARLOW: I thought I wanted to be a psychologist. And I took Psych 101 with three hundred gazillion other people. I took that and sociology. I had a music class that was all Beethoven. I thought my mother was going to kill me because it was so frivolous. And I took archery for my PE because you had to have PE. And she was saying, “But it costs money; it costs money.” Yes, it does. [laughs] And so I have to tell you that I haven’t picked up a bow and arrow since. 

Asch: But did you get an A in the class?
TARLOW: I doubt it. But I do appreciate Beethoven. 

Asch: And so you would have gone on to become a psychologist?
TARLOW: It’s an area that interests me. I tend to read things and analyze every situation. But my life changed drastically when I got married. And I often think about my childhood and I think about growing up in Longview. I’m in a writing class and I’ve written a lot about my childhood and my associations and my family and what they meant to me. And I think I’ve had the best of both worlds growing up in a small town with hovering family. I mean with four grandparents, you have to admit, I was the only grandchild for a long time. And then marrying and living in New York for a while and then in Portland were all very, very different experiences. And as I look back on all of that it was not bad–pretty damned good.

Asch: Glad to hear that. And we have an interview with Larry but let’s hear your side of the story. Was he in a class with you? How did you meet?
TARLOW: Larry was a blind date. I showed you that picture of us at the beach? Well one of my sorority sisters was Shirley Katz Eisenberg. And I didn’t know Shirley before I went to college but we clicked. We both disliked all the things that you and I talked about. We were mavericks; we just bonded. And one summer she invited me to come to Portland to stay at her house. I did and David called her one evening and asked if she wanted to go to a movie and she said “Well Sharon’s here and she’ll come with us or maybe you’ll get her a date.” So David called Larry who was home from college. He was at Stanford. And he said to David, “Oh God. I am sick of blind dates. I do not want to go out on one more date.” So we went out. [laughs] And we went to see the movie Stalag 17 and he held my hand. And that was it. That was probably a Friday or a Saturday night. The next day the four of us drove to the beach (that picture). We had a great time. We just spent the day at the beach and we went out a little bit. I was in Longview; he was in Portland. We communicated; we wrote letters mainly because, who had a cell phone? And that fall he invited me to come to Stanford for the weekend for the big game, which is Cal-Stanford, big deal stuff. And I could stay in a dorm with his friend Sharon Krevin and my parents said OK. Oh my God, it was monumental. My dad drove me to the airport in Portland, first time I’d ever been on a plane. And I went to San Francisco. And he sat in the Portland airport until the plane landed in San Francisco. [laughs]

Asch: Did you then have to call him at the Portland airport?
TARLOW: I called my mom at home to say I had landed. Larry met me. And that was in August and then a year later we got married. He came home at Christmas time. Spring break we got engaged. And then in August we were married.

Asch: And you were married at Temple?
TARLOW: We were married by Rabbi Nodel from Temple [Beth Israel] in the Monticello Hotel in Longview. And it was a rainy, icky, awful day. I think you have my book over there, my wedding pictures. And we got married. And then we drove that night to Long Beach, Washington to spend three days before we got on an airplane and went to New York City where we lived for a year while he got a master’s degree in retailing from NYU. And I worked. And culture shock, oh my God. 

Asch: Where did you work?
TARLOW: I worked for the Merckens chocolate company, which was a block from the United Nations building. So the day was: we got up in the morning. We lived on Second Avenue and Tenth Street. He walked down to NYU at Washington Square. I took the Third Avenue el and went uptown to work. And I was the assistant to a secretary. And I was like the freak of the office. My boss, Mr. Chomasero, from Connecticut, was an uppity Republican WASP. [laughs] He was really nice to me but I had never been around a person like that. He kept saying, “Portland, are the streets paved in Portland?” “Yeah, they are.” And he said, “I’ve been to the west; I’ve been to Chicago.” And we just had this banter of culture, getting to know each other that was amazing. I was very homesick. Larry was in school and part of his schooling was working. That was part of it. But I did have a cousin who I had known from when she visited Longview as a child and I spent a lot of time with her. I would take my lunch and go sit out at the United Nations and just watch what was going on. I loved New York. We went to the theater; we bought the cheapest tickets. We went to the opera. We walked. Sometimes when Larry had to be working I’d get on the bus and ride it to the end and then turn around and come back just to see the city. So that was a year and we lived in an apartment building. I visited it a few years ago; it’s become quite gentrified. The whole area has. Nobody spoke English; everybody spoke Yiddish. We were the only people in the building other than the superintendent that didn’t speak Yiddish. That was fascinating to me. I learned how to cook. It was fun. Every weekend that he wasn’t having to work we did something. And I went to the museums. I just loved it. I had such a good time. And it was different then, too. But we established a relationship with the waiters at this vegetarian, Jewish, kosher restaurant that had the most wonderful food. We would walk in. We didn’t have a lot of money. My dad would send me a little stipend every now and then. And the waiter would tell us what we were going to eat that night. We didn’t say, “I want the soup.” No, no, no. Anyway, it was fun.

Asch: Did you have any urge to stay on the East Coast after that year?
TARLOW: No.

Asch: So it was just a one-year experiment.
TARLOW: No. And we bought a car. Larry’s parents actually arranged for us to buy a car, which we had for a few months before he graduated. We kept it on Staten Island. We’d have to take the subway, take the ferry, get the car…. And then we drove home through the United States and came back to Portland and our families. Then Larry had an interview with a furniture store in LA. He flew down, had the interview. While he was in a cab from the store to the airport he decided, “There are too many people; there is too much traffic. I will never live here.” Thank God he felt that way. And we lived in Portland.

Asch: Where in Portland did you first live?
TARLOW: First we lived with Larry’s parents for a while just to get settled. Then we lived, I can’t remember the name of the street but it was off 39th in kind of a duplex. Then we moved to an apartment right by Cleveland High School, where the Eisnenburgs had lived. They were moving because he was going into the Air Force and we moved into that apartment. And Bud Marcus lived about two doors away. So that was wonderful. We just were together all the time. And then Larry and I moved with our son Stefan to Wyberg Lane in northeast Portland where our second son was born. And after a couple of years there, we rented there, we built our house in Raleigh Hills and we had another kid and a dog, right by Alpenrose Dairy, right off Oleson Road, 5456 SW Dover Court. And we lived there until 20 years ago to the house that I live in now. Which is on Imperial Drive.

Asch: You’d kind of been on the peripheral of the Jewish community here, was it hard to break in?
TARLOW: Here, after I got married?

Asch: Yes.
TARLOW: No, I became very involved in National Council of Jewish Women, as you know. And I have a long history with that. I not only became active in the Jewish community, somewhat—Larry worked all the time, he was in business with his parents at the furniture store and they worked hard, he really did. And I was active in the PTA, I was active in Sunday school stuff and Council, I did a lot of volunteer work. And so I was involved just as much in the general community, I think, as I was in the Jewish community. And then Larry’s friends became my friends. And still are. And then the Chestlers came and they were my friends, and the Delmans and Larry grew up together, Alan Zell and Eddy Coen, they were kids together and David Eisenberg and so many. It’s kind of sad that so many of them aren’t here any more. So many friends of both of ours are gone. But we had a busy life. He worked hard, I had different jobs. When I was raising kids I was home, you saw me as the mother and Brownie Campfire whatever and the Little League lunch packer. Yeah, we were very involved with our children.

Asch: And you were members of Beth Israel the whole time?
TARLOW: The whole time. Larry was confirmed there and yes, we became members when we moved here. Well, as a couple, his family had always been members and my family too but they didn’t know each other of course. 

Asch: Did you send your kids to Sunday school.
TARLOW: Oh yes, oh yes. Our boys were not bar mitzvahed because their father wasn’t. That was a bone of contention but they weren’t. They went to Sunday school, they were all confirmed. In fact, in doing some of the archival work here I have found some of their pictures and their work. It’s astounding, they went to Sunday school and they went to Temple under duress many times. Neither of the boys are married to Jewish—none of my children married Jewish people. Unfortunately, my grandchildren don’t know as much about Judaism as I’d like them to but I wouldn’t change one person in our family for anything. So that is not an issue anymore.

Asch: When did your parents come to Portland?
TARLOW: They came when my boys were in Junior High. They were going to sell their house. My mother had terrible arthritis and it was becoming quite difficult. And they were driving back and forth, back and forth. If somebody had a ball game they were coming. And my dad decided that he was going to retire, he sold his business. And they were going to move into and apartment in Longview and then they decided ‘Well, if we’re going to move to an apartment, why don’t we go where our kids are.’ So the boys were in Junior High and that was in the late 60s, early 70s. And it was wonderful having—they had four grandparents. Plus, Aunt Reisa Tarlow who was single but very much in their lives. So really they had five grandparents.

Asch: Where did your parents live?
TARLOW: My parents lived in Raleigh Hills. I just saw them all the time, we did everything together. I had every occasion that came around at my house. It was neat, it was really neat. My children remember their grandparents so fondly, and I remember mine. We are so fortunate to have had that and I think, I see that coming with my grandchildren, being with the family is very important. They’re all going to be here for Thanksgiving. My grandson is coming from London with his girlfriend so that we can all be together. And even though we may be geographically far apart we are connected. And I see my oldest grandson, Brandon, who is now the father of my two extraordinary great grandchildren, still values the connection with the family very much.

Asch: Could you just give us the full names and birthdates of all of the kids?
TARLOW: I can. Here is a list, my children? OK, Stefan David Tarlow was born April 30, 1956. David Benjamin Tarlow was born September 17, 1958. Mary Carol Tarlow and you notice she put her name in the book by herself, June 8, 1962. Brandon David Tarlow, February 23, 1982. And he was born on my mother’s birthday and she was out of her mind, she was so excited. Daniel Stefan Tarlow was born February 12, 1984. Douglass Cameron Tarlow, November 9, 1986.

Asch: And those are all Stefan’s children?
TARLOW: Those are Stefan and Shelly’s children. David and Lori’s children are Mollie Lynne Tarlow September 28, 1988 and Stefanie Anne Tarlow, June 27, 1991. Ramona, a great granddaughter, Ramona Shelley Tarlow was born 6 June, 2009 and Benjamin Tarlow was born March 1, 2012.

Asch: Your mother was alive when Brandon was born. How many great grandkids was she able to meet?
TARLOW: She had Brandon, Danny and Doug, Mollie and Stefanie. She had all five of them. And on February 23rd, which was the birthday of my mom, he would invite her to lunch at school. So yes, that was a big deal. 

Asch: You showed me a picture of you with your grandmother and you as a kid and then to have a family that has these four generations always overlapping is fascinating.
TARLOW: You know, it’s amazing now, Peter, because I’m the oldest one in our family. We have four generations and I’m the oldest one. It’s very, very…. I don’t know what it is. It is what it is; it’s a good thing. It’s very comfortable; it’s good.

Asch: So after your kids were a little older, is that when you started working?
TARLOW: I did, when my kids were probably in junior high I went to work for Weight Watchers because I was fat. Fatter than I am now. And that was a good experience. The training was good. Public speaking kind of stuff. I got to know some really wonderful people. I used to go to Forest Grove once a week and I became friendly with people that had strawberry farms and grew wheat and had cows. It was good. And then I went to work for the Beaverton school district when Mary was in high school. So the boys were—I think Stefan was in college by then. And I worked for the Beaverton School District for 11 years.

Asch: And what did you do for them?
TARLOW: I was called the Community Resource Coordinator. I was not a teacher. And my job was one of three people. I worked in nine schools and I helped teachers plan field trips and assemblies and I worked with parent clubs doing training and all that kind of stuff. We also helped run a clothes closet which gave clothing to children free of charge or their families, children and family. I did that for a long time; it was a good job. Okay wasn’t very good but my PERS is wonderful so for that I’m grateful. [laughs] 
 
Asch: You mentioned your mother was a community organizer.
TARLOW: Oh yes, my mother was. She was very involved in war bond drives. One year (and I can’t remember how old I was, obviously during the war) she was very involved in the war bond effort. We bought war stamps in school. When Eleanor Roosevelt was on her way from Seattle to Portland she stopped in Longview and my mother took me to see her. I didn’t talk to her or anything but it was pretty amazing.

Asch: So your community involvement and then working as a professional community involvement person, was that something your mother stressed or you just saw your mother doing it?
TARLOW: Well I think my mother was a role model and some of my friends at the time that I went to work were going back to school. This was kind of after my big involvement in NCJW. I kind of cut back a little bit and went to work. I went to work not for the paycheck, although I loved getting a paycheck. I needed something to do more than what I was doing. I just liked to keep busy. I still do, I still like to keep busy, I’m here.

Asch: Yes, and you’re taking classes. You mentioned some of your friends went back to school. Did you ever go back to school?
TARLOW: No, I took various classes or workshops or whatever but I never went back to school to get a degree like some of my friends did. All of my grandchildren—the oldest one is at OHSU in the MD/PhD program. Danny is a post-doc at Cambridge University in England. Doug is working for product design in Ohio. Mollie is a film editor in LA and is finally making a little bit of money. And Stefanie, the youngest one, is in school in Arizona studying to be a physician’s assistant. She’ll graduate this summer. So education had been a priority in our family. With each generation they’ve become more educated, which is a good thing.

Asch: What was it like raising children in the ‘50s and ‘60s? A lot of people we interview talk a lot about Portland community in the ‘40s. but we don’t hear a lot about the post-World War II.
TARLOW: My kids started school in the ‘60s, which was kind of a turbulent time as you might well imagine. Their hairdos were outrageous. They didn’t have things in their ears or noses (although one of my grandsons has an earring). So that’s different. We kept a pretty tight rope on our children. We were strict. That doesn’t mean they were angels at all times; they had their issues. They were in scouting. They were all in sports big time and they were good at sports. They weren’t in college sports but they were in high school. We went to all of the games of our children and our grandchildren. We had television on a limited basis. The boys, particularly. Mary did a little bit. They would come home from school and do their homework and go out and play. We lived in a cul-de-sac. Mary had a dodge ball thing going on out there. And in scouting they were busy. They had, of course, their school friends. I remember that when Stefan was in seventh grade we bought him a calculator; it was as big as a book and it was a big deal. Oh my God, it was a big deal. They got what they needed, we didn’t allow overindulgence by the grandparents because that could have come very easily. We wanted them to understand what it was to be in a family, to have some responsibility at home. That’s why Stefan doesn’t have grass, because he had to mow the lawn and he hated it. They had to help around the house. They didn’t get an allowance particularly. They got what they needed and they got some money now and then. Again it was simple. We encouraged their friends to come and be at our house. We always had extra people and I loved that. And I never minded carpooling because then I knew I had a handle on who’s going were and when. Mary, too, was in scouting and very active in athletics. And they were all good students and we encouraged that. They weren’t such good students in Sunday school however. David had a friend, Jay Weil, oh God. the two of them would skip Sunday school all the time. And one time the rabbi found them at Fred Meyer in the candy department. That did not go over well. They just resented having to go. I feel badly about that but that’s the way it is.

Asch: It sounds like they were similar to your childhood, in the neighborhood friends…
TARLOW: And Larry’s too, Larry played a big role, of course. He wouldn’t allow them to play football. He is the one that insisted that they go to Sunday school and be confirmed. Both of us were only children and the plus-side of that was we made decisions together about family issues, whether it was for our children or our parents. And we didn’t have to consult anybody else. It took away some of the stress of being in a family. We had cousins and uncles and aunts, that sort of thing. 

Asch: The NCJW papers are at the museum and I know we know a lot about your involvement, but why NCJW? You mentioned your involvement in a lot of organizations. Why was NCJW your main one?
TARLOW: I liked the philosophy of working in the community, having an educational arm. Of course their help in Israel was very appealing at the time. The people that belonged were people that I had become acquainted with or were part of the Tarlow family. I found friends there. And I found good causes there. The juvenile justice, working at the Robison Home, I did work at the Robison Home because of NCJW. It was a carryover to Temple, too, because I did Temple tours and some of my friends did that. And also the library committee at Temple was…. I tended toward education and community service and that’s where I feel NCJW had its strengths. Plus, the people that were in the organization became my friends and many of them still are, as you know, and here we are. 

Asch: Was it a coincidence that you were president of the library club in high school, involved in the library at Temple Beth Israel and….
TARLOW: Books were always important. My mother didn’t drive for a long time. And so we often would walk to the library on Saturdays. Especially in the summer we would go to the library at least once a week. We just liked books; we always had books in our house. And the reason I became involved at Temple was because Aunt Raisa Tarlow was the staff librarian volunteer for a long time. And when she couldn’t do it anymore and it sort of went to hell in a handbasket…. Then when Rose Rustin was president, she asked me if I would chair the library committee, which I did for ten years. That’s a whole other story but books are important and learning is important; helping out in the community is important. And I think NCJW just did it for me with smart, educated women and even men sometimes later on. It was good.

Asch: What were your social interactions with that community outside of NCJW?
TARLOW: You mean my girlfriends? Oh yes, we’d do Friday night dinners together. We would have lunch together. The guys became friends. We would entertain. Somebody was going to get married and we’d have a hoopla for them and our kids were friends. We often had Hanukkah together; you name it. Somebody had a baby– we got on board with that too. It was just the things that you do. And for me, being an only child, some of these people were like my sisters. I showed you a picture of me, Berta Delman, Elaine Weinstein and Carol Chestler. We were like sisters. Especially Berta and I; we went way back.

Asch: And you met Berta through you husband?
TARLOW: Yes.

Asch: Is there any story you wanted to put on the record about her?
TARLOW: Oh I could go on about her forever. Her daughter Nicole and my daughter are 13 days apart. We each had two boys; we both got pregnant about the same time and when Nicole was born her dad [Jay] called and said, “We have a girl” blah blah blah blah blah. I hung up the phone and I said to Larry, “They got the girl.” And then a few days later I got the girl. Berta and I were very close. And Jay and Larry too; they grew up together as children, all those three. And Berta and I just hit it off. And our kids are friends. Mary and Nicole are definitely like sisters. And Berta was such an active, caring woman in the community. She was president of Sisterhood at Temple. She was a trailblazer for many social issues, strong connections to the Black community, worked in the Black community for a while. She was head of the women’s law center in Seattle for a bit. She worked for Vera Katz when she was mayor. Then she got sick and she couldn’t do it anymore. And then she died. It’s been about seven years. We still miss her.

Asch: I’m sorry to hear that. You mentioned the feminism and her involvement in things. Was that an interest of yours as well?
TARLOW: Absolutely. And my mom’s, my mother was way before her time. And it was a big issue and it became a kind of sticky issue in the Tarlow family because my father-in-law was, I’m not going to say it. [laughs] He did not support that issue.

Asch: We’ll use the term “traditional.”
TARLOW: Yes, and that’s the other thing about NCJW. These women supported other women and I wanted that for my daughter. I wanted it for my sons. I wanted them to know women are pretty special and have to have their place in a community. I get really ticked off even now when I see things that are a throwback to old thought on the place for a man or a woman. It’s ridiculous.

Asch: Did you feel that the Jewish community in general was more progressive or that particular set of NCJW women?
TARLOW: Much more progressive, I would say–the community as a whole. Temple at that time was pretty liberal and progressive. That’s changing too. They’re becoming more conservative, I think, in their thought. But I think the whole Reform movement is doing that. But still think there’s a place for women. And I always applauded Rabbi Rose when he would hire a woman. When he hired Judy Schiff to become cantor I thought that was unbelievably wonderful. I don’t like labels on people, you know. I don’t like it when people say, “You know that guy, the black guy, who has curly hair.” It’s, ‘the guy who had curly hair.’ One of my neighbors in the Dover Courthouse introduced me to the priest, the family priest, “This is my Jewish friend.” And I said to her, “Agnes, I’m your friend.” I just don’t like those labels and I think I learned that from my mom and my dad; they were color blind. They just didn’t care. And of course growing up in Longview we didn’t have a lot of black families or Asian families or whatever families. We had mostly Christian families. You just have to understand and be kind to people. That’s how I think.

Asch: Does it work for you, do you think?
TARLOW: Yes, I think.

Asch: I wanted to get back to something you mentioned earlier. You talked about people coming to the back porch of your grandparents’ house during the Depression. Were they Jewish families, were they local people?
TARLOW: No, they were, I want to say vagrants, that might be too harsh. You know how you see the pictures of men standing in a line waiting for food during the Depression? These were that kind. They weren’t slovenly; they were desperate. My grandmother must have been known in their community that they could get a hot bowl of soup or a sandwich from my grandmother. I mean she didn’t have a lot of stuff either. They didn’t have a lot of money. But I think it started there maybe even, with seeing her care for the people that came to the back door. She didn’t even ask them their names; she didn’t care. And my dad brought the dogs home. My grandmother used to get so mad at him. As a kid, if there was a stray dog that looked hungry he came home. They were helped, somebody helped them get out of Europe and come to this country and they were going to share that. And my grandfather, my Rosenblum grandfather was just so proud to be an American. When he got his citizenship I wasn’t around but when it came time to vote he voted. It was just what you did. You helped others and you were grateful for what others did for you, you carry it on. And I think that’s what communities do and I think that’s what families do. And when I see my son with his grandchild I just go to pieces. It just warms my heart. When Benjamin is following him around saying, “ Papa, Papa” and pulling on his leg I just love it, I love it. 

Asch:      Did you ever get a chance to talk to your grandmother about that period? 
TARLOW: Not really because I was so young. I wish (and I’m sure there are many people who wish) that I could be asking my grandmothers the questions you are asking me. Because my grandma Crystal did not want to talk about much of her life in Austria and what she had to go through. I mean, she was a peasant. She lost family during the war. My mother used to write letters for her. She could read and write English but not really well. My mom would write the letters and someone would obviously interpret them. And then all of a sudden you didn’t hear anymore. So I wish I could ask more questions. One time Larry and I were in England and we went to the neighborhood that I knew that my Rosenblum grandparents lived in on their way to this county. They lived in the ghetto of London. We went there and ate a corned beef sandwich that was to die for. [laughs] I wasn’t smart enough then to ask all those questions. I just took it all for granted. I didn’t suffer the hardships that they did. And they didn’t want to talk about it. You know that. The people that survived the holocaust often didn’t want to talk about it for years. And they didn’t either. 

Asch:      But you’ve recently done some genealogical research. Were there any surprises in there that you didn’t expect? 
TARLOW: I think my grandfather’s Americanization papers, being able to find their social security information. Even though I had seen the headstones in the Spokane cemetery, to have a picture of them. I learned a little bit about a great grandfather that I didn’t know before. I found a family in Schenectady where the Marcus family originated. Bud and I cannot figure all that out but I communicated with them through a cousin I have in Sacramento who was my friend in New York while I was there as a bride. Yes, I did and I got pictures of the Schenectady family but they don’t want to go further with it. I’ve tried to connect with the Kors family; that was my mother’s family. They don’t want to have any part of me either. This one cousin of hers I met through happenstance—we came together in Palm Desert and he was such a jerk. When I started with the genealogy I wrote to him asking him questions and he wouldn’t answer me. And he has some children in California and I have not contacted them. One of his sons if very active in the gay community in San Francisco; he’s a lawyer. When they were having that big vote, remember? He was one of the primary people. So he’s a very intelligent and well situated political person. I just haven’t had the guts to contact him. But maybe some day. 

Asch:      The final question, and obviously you can add anything you want at the end, is: you’ve now spent almost ten years working for the Oregon Jewish Museum, you’re interested in genealogy, what is your hope for a lasting effect on the community? 
TARLOW: I think the work that I’ve done with the other people that I’ve done it with…. I don’t do this by myself. I remember coming to OJM via Lila Goodman. There were no walls and I was on the board with her. I can’t remember who was president. And I just became captivated by the work that was going on and the people that were doing the work. You guys are amazing. It’s such a necessary part of the continuation, I feel, of the Jewish community in Portland, in all of Oregon. The history gives us a basis of how to move on I think. It’s like my family. My grandparents set a pattern that we’ve all followed in. Then when I see it in my grandson with his children and I see that as OJM doing that for the community, carrying out the history and the importance of the pioneers, the Jewish Pioneers. You see some of the people that are involved with it now. I think it plays a really important part. And I’m really am happy that I can say I was a part of it. I tell people about what I do, whether they’re Jewish or not. And then my writing class, oh my God, I am their token Jew. They are fascinated by what I tell them about what goes on here. And some of them have even visited because of what I’ve told them. So I feel like I’m helping to educate the community. I’m helping to keep this place going although financially I can’t support it like a lot of people can. But I just feel like I’ve been part of something that’s really important. And I feel that way about Temple and I feel that way about National Council of Jewish Women. That they’re all important. 

Asch: Thank you. Do you have any other comments that you’d like to add to the record? 
TARLOW: This has been just great. And you know, being where you are and interviewing people, I was really nervous about this and I thought, “I’ve got to be prepared or I won’t get an A and that would really upset my family.” It’s good and it makes me go back to the history that I enjoy so much and thinking about my family and going through all the pictures I have at home. I should bring them all here. Anyway, you have done a great job with me and I loved it. 

[recording pauses and resumes]

Asch:      Sharon talked a little bit about her work with the art museum. 
TARLOW: After I quit working for the Beaverton School District and because of my friend Lila Goodman I became a docent and a tour guide at the Portland Art Museum. It required a year’s training of learning about the museum. It was a highlight for me because of the educational value that came with it. Having to give tours was what you just had to do. But learning so much, and if you learned one thing that led to five or six other things. So if you learned about an Indian basket made by the Plateau Tribe of Eastern Oregon it led you to learn about the tribes from all over the country. It was wonderful and I also became very involved in the docent council because of my friendship with Lila and I forged many friends. Again it just goes back to the fun of learning and the fun of sharing what you know. My least favorite age group was adults. They’re rude; they don’t pay attention and they weren’t very interesting. My favorite were seventh graders and third graders and the kids from the Metropolitan Learning Center. They were all wonderful. I did that for a long time. And then I became a sustainer which means you can still be part of the docent council but you don’t have to do the required number of tours that you had to do otherwise. And the other thing I wanted to mention that was really important in my life is my mah jongg group. Those are some of my National Council friends that I met then. We play mah jongg. We have a Shabbat group. Those are all important parts of my life. The docenting came out of the interest that I have for art and the inability to make great art. But when I was planning field trips for the school district I would set up tours. So many of the children and teachers had never been to the museum so that really sparked my interest in that. And then I’m going to be a docent for the Anne Frank exhibit that’s here because of my docenting for the other Anne Frank exhibit that was here a few years ago where I was in charge of all the docents. 

Asch: Your mah jongg group, who was in that? Is it a steady roster? 
TARLOW: I gave you a picture of some of them. It’s a pretty steady roster. Joan Leibriech was one of the people originally in it. And also Eva Friedman played with us. But now it’s Rosemary Rosenfeld, Elaine Weinstein when she’s here, Davia Rubenstein, Carol Chestler, Jeanne Newmark and me. And there were eight of us when Joan was alive. And when she died we never replaced her. We can’t bring ourselves to replace her.

Asch: Did you learn mah jongg from you mother?
TARLOW: My mother did play mah jongg and my father also played mah jongg. But I didn’t until—in fact we figured this is when we started, in 1995, when we all had brown hair. 

Asch: So soon it will be your 20th anniversary. 
TARLOW: Yeah, we should have a party. That’s how I spent my time. And I still spend my time doing that. And I did volunteer work at the shelter which I don’t do anymore. I just manage to stay as busy as I can. 

Asch: Well you come here every week. 
TARLOW: I do and I love it.

Sharon’s addendum to interview: More info from the 1940s and ‘50s.

Next to our house there was a vacant lot. I’d say it was 50 ft. by 100 ft. as were most of the lots on the block. Half the lot was our family’s Victory garden. The other half served as a play area for the kids in the neighborhood. Victory gardens were encouraged by the government as a way to supplement the food supply. My parents and grandparents grew carrots, onions, cucumbers, lettuce, beets and some potatoes. The play area was where we kids played “war.” The boys dug foxholes and had play guns. My girlfriend and I were “nurses” (!!) The “General” would not allow us to carry guns.

The other thing I remembered was that my dad sponsored two families from Germany. He arranged for them to have housing and secure a job. My dad owned a grocery store so food for them was also provided. I remember accompanying a boy my age to school and how some of the students made fun of him because his clothes were different and he didn’t speak English. That day, after school, my grandmother took him shopping (so that he would have clothes that looked like the other children’s). Both of the families eventually moved to Portland.

In the ‘50s, when I was in high school, our friend Cy Goldberg bought a black and white
television. He set it up in part of the warehouse of his furniture store, along with chairs. We were often invited to go there after dinner and watch. I cannot remember the programs.
A few years later we had our own TV. Wow!!

One of the boys in my neighborhood, who was a year older than I (and had a driver’s license) taught me to drive in his army surplus jeep, with a stick shift, in an empty lot far from home so my parents might not know. They soon found out. It wasn’t pretty!!

From the time I was eight years old until about 16 I attended the Longview YMCA summer camp at Mt. St. Helens. I was a camper and then later a counselor. You could only reach the camp by boat on Spirit Lake or by hiking in from the resort where there was parking. There was no running water (only in the kitchen), no windows on the cabins that contained seven girl campers and a counselor. No boys. The boys came at another time. That’s where I learned the song, Jesus Loves Me.

As I said before, life was very different then it is today for young people. Most activities were in or close to home. One car, one bathroom in the house, one telephone for all. The Bendix washing machine (when we finally got one) was bolted to the floor in the basement. No dryer. Clothes were hung on a line both inside and out depending on the weather. No dishwasher for many years.